Tuesday, December 16, 2014

I'LL SEE YOU UNDER THE TABLE

A day late and several hundred big ones in the hole. Damn.

Eugh. I hate looking at my own work. It reminds me of all my flaws as a writer and as a person. Looking backwards distracts from the present. 

I dunno what to say when I look at my writing. Let's take the diagnostic essay. I pretty much wrote about my belief in the value of friendship. You know, the whole "No man is an island" sorta ideal. The way I see it is I've been influenced by three things; experience, culture and counterculture. My expereinces have taught me that we are very much connected to our environments, including the people around us. The high values I place on friendship or "social links" stems from a lot of cartoons and games I used to watch and play. For some reason a ton of Japanese kids shows express themes of friendship and teamwork. It's pretty fun. Some of the storytelling in those games and shows are really good, considering the type of audience they're usually made for. Anyway, the final thing is counterculture, or anti-meta. Modern day America, and arguably much of the world, has been shaped by neoliberal ideologies. One such ideology I am critical of is the idea of rugged individualism. It;s the sort of idea that people had in their minds when they went out to settle the west, that Davy Crockett tough man act. Levi's' (the jeans company) used the slogan "Go Forth" along with images of sprawling plains and fields, derived from nostalgic mid-western sceneries of olde America. I hate that shit. No one does anything on their own, and if they do, they're probably fucking miserable at the end of the day. Having someone to lean on, having people you can trust. That's important. I love ideas that counter the mainstream. I make an active effort to not listen to recent music. I waste my money making ancient, out-of format decks. Maybe i'm trying to find myself. Maybe i'm attempting to contruct my identity by identifying what I am not. I have to say, some of the things I've learned a lot about myself over the course of this semester. I like that. 

Let's see, Blog post 1? I think this was the one where we write about a narrative in our major. I wrote about all the crap that goes on in the cinema industry today, specifically with how race is involved and who's included and who;s excluded. This was a cookie cutter write up, I feel. Really simple ideas, just with more recent evidence. 


Paper 2. I was very upset with myself and everything around me and this was my temper tantrum. I was unable to step out of my discourse. The film, "Waltz with Bashir" appealed to the revolutionary in me. It's an unconventional expose of an (unfortunately) obscure foreign conflict (genocide). I've got stars in my eyes. This movie is beautiful. Folman made a movie about something ugly but painted it in a format that keeps you from looking away. You're forced to watch through Folman's dry satire of the glory of war. Counter to American war films. Delicious. 

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